WELTANSHAUUNG

A combination of the German words Welt meaning "world" and anschauen meaning "to view." One's weltanschauung is one's fundamental beliefs about the world and life. It is one of the ideal wishes of mankind. When one believes in such a thing, one feels secure in life, one knows what one ought to strive after, and how one ought to organise one’s emotions and interests to the best purpose..


Monday, January 15, 2007

celebrity faces

i found this reaaly cool website where you can upload a photo and they match you with a celebrity look-a-like. hehehe

Monday, November 13, 2006

Baguio Retreat

November 9-12 marks the date of our Baguio Retreat. We stayed for 3 days and 3 nights at the star mountain hotel. We had a blast. My group and I had a chance to bond together, especially during our last night. It was really fun and memorable.

The first..the worst..but definitely not the last!

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Different shades of Grey



One of the reasons why I like watching Grey's Anatomy is that she always has some "quotable quotes" at the start and end of the episode. My favorite ofcourse is the line she said to McDreamy when she was really desperate.

"Okay, here it is, your choice... it's simple, her or me, and I'm sure she is really great. But Derek, I love you, in a really, really big pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me, choose me, love me."

Here are other quotes/lines from the series, enjoy reading:

At some point, you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That's how we're made. So, you can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them. But there are some lines... that are way too dangerous to cross.

You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true.

At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying.

Intimacy is a four syllable word for, "Here's my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger, and enjoy." It's both desired, and feared. Difficult to live with, and impossible to live without. Intimacy also comes attached to the three R's... relatives, romance, and roommates. There are some things you can't escape. And other things you just don't want to know.

I wish there were a rulebook for intimacy. Some kind of guide to tell you when you've crossed the line. It would be nice if you could see it coming, and I don't know how you fit it on a map. You take it where you can get it, and keep it as long as you can. And as for rules, maybe there are none. Maybe the rules of intimacy are something you have to define for yourself.

Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers, you just breath deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed but sometimes the pain gets you where you least expect it. Hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it and life always makes more.

Denial. It's not just a river in Egypt. It's a freakin' ocean.

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world. Head on, guns blazing. De Nile. It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?

They say practice makes perfect. Theory is, the more you think like a surgeon, the more you become one. Better you get at remaining neutral, clinical. Cut, suture, close. And the harder it becomes to turn it off. To stop thinking like a surgeon and remember what it means to think like a human being.

To be a good surgeon, you have to think like a surgeon. Emotions are messy. Tuck them neatly away and step into a clean, sterile room where the procedure is simple. Cut, suture, close. But sometimes you're faced to a cut that won't heal. A cut that rips its stitches wide open.

There's something to be said about a glass half full. About knowing when to say when. I think it's a floating line. A barometer of need and desire. It's entirely up to the individual. And depends on what's being poured. Sometimes all we want is a taste. Other times there's no such thing as enough, the glass is bottomless. And all we want, is more.

Maybe we're not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful means recognizing what you have for what it is. Appreciating small victories. Admiring the struggle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the familiar things we know. And maybe we're thankful for the things we'll never know. At the end of the day, the fact that we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate.

Surgeons are control freaks. With a scalpel in your hand, you feel unstoppable. There's no fear, there's no pain. You're ten-feet tall and bulletproof. And then you leave the OR. And all that perfection, all that beautiful control, just falls to crap.

No-one likes to lose control, but as a surgeon there's nothing worse. It's a sign of weakness, of not being up to the task. And still there are times when it just gets away from you. When the world stops spinning and you realize that your shiny little scalpel isn't gonna save you. No matter how hard you fight it, you fall. And it's scary as hell. Except there's an upside to freefalling. It's the chance you give your friends to catch you.

The key to surviving a surgical internship is denial. We deny that we're tired, we deny that we're scared, we deny how badly we want to succeed. And most importantly, we deny that we're in denial. We only see what we want to see and believe what we want to believe, and it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while the lies start to seem like the truth. We deny so much that we can't recognize the truth right in front of our faces.

As surgeons, there are so many things we have to know. We have to know we have what it takes. We have to know how to take care of our patients... and how to take care of each other. Eventually, we even have to figure out how to take care of ourselves. As surgeons we have to be in the know. But as human beings, sometimes it's better to stay in the dark, because in the dark there may be fear, but there's also hope.

At the end of the day, there are some things you just can't help but talk about. Some things we just don't want to hear, and some things we say because we can't be silent any longer. Some things are more than what you say, they're what you do. Some things you say cause there's no other choice. Some things you keep to yourself. And not too often, but every now and then, some things simply speak for themselves.

When you were a kid, it was Halloween candy. You hid it from your parents and you ate it until you got sick. In college, it was the heavy combo of youth, tequila and well, you know. As a surgeon, you take as much of the good as you can get because it doesn't come around nearly as often as it should. 'Cause good things aren't always what they seem. Too much of anything, even love, is not always a good thing.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Medical Series

Bakit ba ganun? kung kelan naman ako nagka-broadband, saka naman ako hindi makapag-post sa blog. Dati na parang-pagong ang bagal ng aking dial-up medyo masipagsipag pa ako.

Ano nga ba pinagkakaabalahan ko ngayon?

Nasa OB na ang rotation ko ngayon. Halos lahat ng mga tao sinasabihan ako mag-OB. Hindi naman bagay sa akin. I just don't see myself as an OB. No offense to the OBs out there. Pero malay natin biglang mag-iba ang ihip ng hangin at mapadpad ako dun sa residency....Yaw ko magsalita ng tapos. Pedia pa rin kasi ang gusto ko (sana). Matagal-tagal pa naman ang pagpili nun. In the meantime gusto ko muna magprepare sa boards

Nga pala, nanunuod din ako ng mga medical (drama) series. Yung Grey's Anatomy at House M.D. Tingin ko lahat ng mga med students at doctor-(doctoran) alam ang mga series na to. Hindi ko napanuod masyado yung mga dating series tulad ng E.R at Scrubs. Pero yung sa 2 ito, dumayo pa ako ng Quiapo para makabili ng seasons 1-2. At dahil sa broadband, na-dodownload ko na ngayon ng season 3.

Personal favorite ko si Merideth Grey... syempre kasi siya ung bida. Nakakatuwa kasi mga characters sa Grey's. Light lang yung mga theme, hindi sobrang serious. Plus, cutey si McDreamy at si McSteamy!!!!

Ibang level naman kasi ang house M.D e. Hindi siya yung by the book na doctor. He follows his gut instincts..na more often than not ay tama. Sabi nga ni Foreman, "He's a manipulative b*st*rd. But he's the best damn doctor there is." Hindi siya naniniwaka sa patient care. Hindi kasi siya galing sa isang Royal Pontifical chuvaness na med school. Hehehe.

Anyweys, cge manunuod na ko. Next time na uli.

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Tondo Medical Center


Ako ngayon ay nag-rorotate sa Gynecology. Kakatapos ko lang ng 10 days na rotation sa...

Unang araw namin ni Zero dun from ang post namin. So after mag-courtesy call at mag-orient, pinagawa na kami ng mga discharge summary ng lahat ng mga nanganak nung nakalipas na araw, mga pasyente na ni hindi namin kilala o nakita. Sabagay, de-BOX naman ang sinusulat dun:
"On admission, patient placed on NPO and hooked to D5LRS. Patient underwent labor and delivered via NSD (o CS) to a live baby boy (o girl). The rest of the hospital stay was unremarkable. Patient discharged stable"

Hanep na course in the ward no?

Nung nag-duty na kami, nag-ER na lang ako..ayoko na kasi magpaanak. So lahat ng duties ko sa ER lang ako. Madami rin pala ang mga pasyente na pumupunta sa TMC. Karamihan sa kanila galing sa Tondo-Caloocan-Navotas areas. Halos lahat nasa class D-E-F (meron bang F?). Nambabarog din pala ng pasyente doon. Akala ko dati na libre lahat sa TMC tulad sa Fabella. Hindi pala, para manganak ng normal dun o maraspa, kelangan meron kang atleast P2000. Pag CS naman, 5000-6000 ang gagastusin. Kawawa tuloy yung mga walang pera na halos manganganak na.

Ang mga residente doon, in general mababait. Meron lang iba na medyo mautos at nakakainis. Basta, kung sino man siya...

Nakakapagod ang 10 araw ko doon. Suwerte na ang makatulog ng 1 oras doon. O maka-idlip man lang.
Ngayon balik USTE nanaman ako. Ang daming bago.. may mga PRE-RES na. May isa kaming ka-group na nag-LOA na. Hay naku.




Saturday, September 09, 2006

I'm back

it's been a while since i've posted anything on this blog. matagal na ko dapat na nagpost but i have so much to do with so little time. since the start of internship, i found it hard to manage my time.
internship is really tiring. the few hours that i have left i spend sleeping...WASTED!

i really have nothing much to write. i just wanna tell everybody that i'm still alive!!!

hi doc broks!!! congrats for passing the boards... and all the med board passers.

Friday, May 12, 2006

Internship Blues - Nursery Pay


Unang rotation ng internship ko ay Pediatrics. Buti na lang at sa pay ang una namin, so kahit mainit ang panahon hindi masyadong nararamdaman kasi air-con doon. Sa nursery ang unang post ko, at tsaka konting TR (treatment room). Pero mas nag-enjoy ako sa nursery. Bale 4 duties lang yon.

Mababait yung mga nurse sa nursery...Sina Ma'am Sydney, Fred, Tere, Joy. Sobrang helpful sila sa akin, lalo na alam nila na ka-kastart palang namin sa internship. Hindi sila na-nonoxic tulad ng ibang mga narses.

Pati na mga residents and fellow na duty dun sa nursery mabait din.

Kapag ako yung duty sa nursery, natutuwa ang mga nars, hindi daw kasi ako toxic. Pinakamarami na siguro ang 2 sa na-ca-catch namin na baby. Minsan wala talaga. Nakakatulog pa ako dun.

Pati mga babies cute. Papakilala ko yung ibang mga babies dun.


Eto si Baby Girl Aguilar (medyo mukha siyang boy). 18 lang ang mom niya, unfortunately, iniwan na cya nung father ng baby. Medyo maliit lang siya. Isa siya sa mga mababait na baby. Ang mommy niya laging pumupunta sa nursery para magbreastfeed (mother-baby friendly hospital ang UST). Inaantok na siya ng kuhanan ko siya ng picture, kakatapos lang kasi mag-milk feeding.

Baby boy Pimentel. Siya yung tinatawag kong "red baby", namumula kasi siya. Medyo mataas kasi ang bilirubin levels niya. Isa siya sa mga maiingay na babie. Laging gustong magpakarga or mag-milk feeding. Isa sin siya sa mga babies na laging may IV meds na kelangang i-push for 30 mins.

Siya naman ang pinakasikat na baby sa nursery. Ang tawag sa kanya ay "MIMI". Akala ko tuloy babae siya, hindi pala, siya si Baby boy Acuna. One month old na siya today (May 12, 2006). Meron siyang cleft lip and palate and G6PD deficiency, hindi pa siya pumasa sa hearing screening. Medyo madrama ang buhay ng batang ito. Mula kasi nung ma-discharge ang mommy niya, hindi na uli siya dinalaw (pang-8 na siyang baby). So mula non, parang naging adopted son na siya ng mga taga-nursery. Binibigyan siya ng diaper, damit, shoes at kung anu-ano pa. Sa tagal niya sa nursery, hindi siya kasya sa crib. Na-contact na daw ang mommy, sabi dadalaw na din sa Saturday. Sana nga. Kawawa naman si Mimi-yo!